Fa – the Green Dragon

A Place for the Odd Musings of an Expat Bristolian

Category Archives: Stories in Rhyme


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A Night to Remember

In 1992 I had just arrived in the USA from China where I had been working for almost 4 years. I had started to work for a hotel group with about 4 properties in the Twin Cities area. Not long after starting, the city of St. Paul, Minnesota was the venue of an exhibit of the Titanic. My hotel was one of the sponsoring hotels. As part of the promotion we invited corporate accounts to a special reception and a chance to visit the Titanic exhibit. The reception menu was replicated from the first class menu served to the passengers aboard the maiden voyage. I saved a copy of the promotional material which was printed for the occasion. The material featured the two vessels of the White Star Line; the SS Olympic and the RMS Titanic. On the reverse side was the celebrated menu. I used the various dishes served to cook up the following poem.

The title of the poem recalls the original film made in Black and white with the title “A Night to Remember” starring Kenneth More and Honor Blackman which was released about July 1958. The RMS Titanic sank 105 years ago on April 14th, 1912.

 

A BITE TO REMEMBER

 

The night we remember,

When the Titanic sank deep down

First Class passengers were dining,

Like a night out on the town

 

Their dinner on that fateful night

First oysters a la Russe

Canapés à l’amiral

And then a sherbet mousse

 

Second course of soups

One came from the Volga

Cream of barley in a bowl

And too, consommé Olga

 

Third course served was from the sea

Not brought in a terrine

Poached salmon on a gilded plate

With sauce of mousseline

 

Fourth course were the entrées

With filet mignons Lili

Or chicken Lyonnaise

And vegetable marrow farci

 

Fifth course they call removes

With lamb and sauce of mint

And duck with Calvados,

Just a little hint

 

These were paired with veggies

Healthy garden fare

Spuds, carrots, minted pea timbales

All of them were there.

 

To clean the palette sixth, was served

Punch Romaine or sorbet

The choices two but simple

You only had to say

 

Seventh course was roasted squab

On a bed of wilted cress

Exquisite dining for the price

You could not ask for less

 

Eighth course was a salad

With champagne Vinaigrette

This was such a tasty dish

Whoever could forget?

 

The ninth course was a cold dish

Of Pâté de Foie Gras

Goose livers all the way from France

Where food is Ooh la la!

 

Comes now course number ten

Peaches in chartreuse jelly

Waldorf pudding, chocolate eclairs

Watch out for your belly

 

Eleventh course,

Of fruit and cheese.

By now more food

Is one tight squeeze

 

And finally a bourbon tasting

Best to sip it slow

And on that note I’ll say farewell

This was a fine last supper of some who rest below.

RMS Titanic -First Class menu
Titanic First Class menu.
This is a replica of the boarding pass issued to Mr. Edward Ernest BNye (Elizabeth Ramell) from Orange New Jersey.


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Gone in a cloud of dust

I stopped my smoking

Then they knocked me to the ground

Recycled my bricks

The Old Power Station


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Camp Chaos

CAMP CHAOS

 

To preserve my waning sanity, I took a little break

To sort out what news is true and which of it is fake.

The goings-on at Camp Chaos are running full amok

Even the inner sanctum it seems are learning how to duck

 

Sessions knows the truth and has himself recused

From looking into matters of which Trumpty’s been accused

The whole lot lie, like  a rug upon the floor

No real news we hear just lies and lies galore

 

“I don’t know” “I can’t recall” “much more I cannot say”

All of them it seems are in SwampKing Donald’s pay

It seems like SwampKing Donald flew into a rage

When his staffers told him, he’s on a different page.

 

Bannon threw his arms up, poking at the air

While Spicer and Ms. Conway alternative facts did share.

Trump Tower wires were tapped is Trumpty’s latest tweeting

Completely unsupported to distract from Russian meetings

 

Swampking Donald’s madness is like that of George the third

But George he was quite cuckoo and Trumpty’s just absurd.

Thinks that he can govern by Executive Order alone

What he needs is leadership to really set the tone.

 

He’s made us just a laughing stock; kids snicker they’re not fools

They dread the wealthy moron he put in charge of all our schools.

He wants to get more nukes and planes and ships as well

SALT treaty be damned, he’ll lead us all to hell

 

He thrives on megalomania a big dose every day

And sycophantic yes-men who round him like to play

They can’t stand up to Trumpty and tell him he’s not cool

They’ll all stand by in silence while he acts just like a fool

 

He likes to go to Florida each weekend just to play

The Eleven million that it costs, we taxpayers have to pay

Some say he spent already what took Obama seven years to do

Bestowing his largesse upon his favorite few

 

They are mostly family, to us a huge expense

You wouldn’t mind so much If Trumpty made some sense.

Last weekend he had to go, go there all alone

The only things he likes to pack, his phone and orange comb

 

Oh! And don’t forget the glue that keeps his wig on straight

He saves his old toupees they say to use as fishing bait

He likes to golf in Florida and hit those little balls

It’s his escape from governing between his business calls.

 

I still don’t understand what his followers hope to gain

Have they not yet realized the man his quite insane

He has no self-control and lives in fantasy

Tweeting out old news he’s seen on channel three

 

He does not stick to facts; relies on tabloid news

He loves when he finds something that he can use

It does not matter if it’s old or from another year

He tweets it out, a constant stream like he’s chugging beer.

 

Ah well enough! My hair is turning grey.

I’ll have to take another rest though I have much more to say

I guess I won’t be finished until Trumpty’s done and gone

Perhaps he’ll be impeached for such a massive con.


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Asian Fare

Asian Fare

I like Chinese food he said
Why’s that? He was asked
It’s got a taste, but I can’t declare
The flavour sometimes masked.

Allow me then to take you,
On a little tour
We’ll begin perhaps with India
And then Japan for more.

Refrigeration is paramount
To keep food fresh and nice
But when it gets to a certain point
You have to use some spice.

Garam Masala’s good and hot
And so is Madras curry
Important though that when you cook
Do it slowly, do not hurry.

Koreans like to pickle
And of course they serve with rice
Kim-chi is a favorite dish
But not like bread to slice

It’s hot and spicy and then fermented
Exotic food that they invented
To use the cabbages that they grow
Fields and fields, row after row

Viet-Nam has Pho, a tasty noodle soup
With chicken that comes straight from the coop
And then there’s China and its cuisine
Strange snake bile soup and owl spleen

Of course Chinese pepper has a fragrant smell
Makes many dishes go down really  well
Especially when served with rice
Brings the taste to twice as nice

After China there’s Japan
Cultural creations made by man
Kaiseki, Japan’s most expensive eats
Carefully made artistic feasts

But being honest, you have a choice
Drive through a Subway and with your voice
Speak to an electronic clown
It will take your order down

And deliver it at window number two
Their creation will be made just for you.
Enjoy your sandwich, lunchtime fare
Often made with Asian care.